Last day of May

We are still in lockdown, there has been some easing up, we can meet some people out doors, we can meet some in our garden, some shops are opening up, there is a conflict about if and when schools go back. I cannot keep up any interest in any of it now.I believe that whatever the government tell us,  we have to take responsibility for ourselves.

There have been a good few highlights since I last wrote this blog.

I have treated myself to some new things, enjoyed a bit of retail therapy.

I bought two small round coffee tables ,two small cushions one large cushion, and a throw, all in the same design as the cushion Jackie gave me for my 70th birthday.

I have bought three pairs of cotton trousers and new underwear.  I got a jigsaw puzzle of Inveraray Castle on ebay for Andrew and Lucy and two old Inveraray postcards for myself. Reading the messages on the cards is really touching and I love seeing the old stamps.

I sent large bars of chocolate, and notes on cards, to each  the Cambridge and London grandchildren.

I found on Ebay ; Thomasina by Paul Gallico. I ordered it for myself.I had a copy that John gave me that belonged to his beloved Mother. Reading it was like a balm for me when I was going through a tough time . It is set in a made up Scottish village, but to me it is and always will be Inveraray.

I took the book to David last year when I went to visit him in Pasadena.I don't know if he will read it, but he was definitely pleased and touched to have something of his grandmothers.

It is a very old book the pages are turing brown and the spine is falling off, but it was precious to John and me and now David.

I ordered the new one on ebay but was not sure what would come as there was no picture available.

Imagine my surprise and delight when an exact copy of the one that I took to David
came through the post. I smile each time I look at it and look forward to reading it again.

I am waiting for two sundresses to arrive, and that will be me finished, very satisfied with all my purchases.

I have loved my weekly zooms, with Matthew and Marie, sometimes just the three of us, sometimes with other family members, yesterday it was so good to have Philip with us on Zoom. Along with Andrew ,Lucy ,Scott, Greg and Sandra.

I enjoy the Monday sisters Zoom too.

Tony came past last week , we usually have a chat at the window, this time we sat distantly in the garden, it was nice.

Stef came and took a picture of me in the garden,  it is part of a project of hers to get pictures of all her local friends wearing an outfit they can't wait to wear when lockdown is over. I chose the dress I have bought to celebrate being a mum for 5o years, hopefully one they day and with Andrew.

This week I had my first ,meet a friend in the park, moment. I met Tony at The Mystery we sat on a fallen tree one at each end.I took two small flasks of coffee,  and some biscuits, we enjoyed the coffee and  a passing dog helped itself to the biscuits.

I enjoyed joining in a quiz with Andrew and Lucy on Thursday evening. We did not win , but it is a nice way to spend an evening.

I am missing my Zoom choir .Su is having technical problems, we are all in touch on whatapp. I hear how folk are, but the singing is therapeutic.

I sing along with favourite songs most days as Su says use it or use it.

I also do the slosh most days after Jane Fonda. I am really getting the hang of it now.


I miss Pasty, Kev, Sue Margaret. Pete and Jenny ;unfortunately they are all too far away to meet in the park.

Day'll come hen, as my much loved Granda always said.

I am still happily counselling on the phone and I have now taken part in a Zoom counselling session and supervision session.

I am enjoying listening to Radio 4, love Jackie Kay's poems for lockdown. I love hearing how creative the arts are being; each museum ,art gallery, theatre finding ways to keep in touch and entertain us.

I hope against hope they will all get funding to keep each and every one of them afloat.

The world outside of my bubble seeps in , the nightmare of covid and the deaths, the tragic death of a young black man in USA and the riots that have followed, the worry about Hong Kong.The worry about the economy.

I  do all I can to stay positive with an open loving heart .I am trying out new recipes , I made some pickled red cabbage yesterday and humous and rocky road and soda bread today. it is good for my soul.

All shall be well
and all shall be well
and all manner of things shall be well

May 19

it is a while since I have blogged.

I have had awful toothache, been on antibiotics, recovered from that and I am now out the other side.

I could not see a dentist ; it was a phone call and a toss up between an extraction ,the only dental option, and antibiotics.

It was a beautiful week the week I was on the meds. I did not feel well enough to go out at all.

Since then I have enjoyed my work which is increasing . I think due to Lock down. It is very tough for all of us but some more than others.

I have contributed to a podcast that my daughter in law is making . She is interviewing folk around the world to hear their experiences of lock down and I enjoyed contributing to that.


I hardly listen to the news these days.I find it too depressing . I think in the end we will all have to make our own decisions about which risks we are willing to take. I worry that like Brexit this pandemic is divisive  or at least the way it has been handled and reported.The rich still have more choices than the rest of us.The Government are not able to unite us ,  we the people ,don't feel safe in their hands.


On the bright side I have plenty flour, thanks to Andrew and Lucy and Marie. It was so good to see A&L in the flesh at my window. I was able to resist my natural inclination to hug them.

I made some cakes for my neighbour's birthday and some small cakes for my shopping tribe.


I enjoy my Zoom glass of wine with them and I enjoyed joining in a quiz with them one night last week.  We won :)
We had a great Zoom with Matthew Marie, Matthew Jeanne and Greg on Saturday afternoon, and when everyone left, Matthew Marie and I  carried on for another two hours. I am becoming used to Zoom  now.

I did my first Zoom supervision session this week and it went well.

I should be in Castalla now for my planned two months holiday. I feel sad I miss castlenel , the sunshine, my neighbours and the cafe's and shops along with my trips to see the Med.


Even though I know none of that is available over there now anyway.

I had two unexpected parcels this week, one from Taiwan and one from Ireland.

From Tailand my parcel was from Philip, it contained a mixture of things.

My favourite is a beautiful shawl  hat he bought in Thailand, a Taiwan tea towel, onion holder, makeup mirror, Winnie the pooh sox.

The Irish parcel was from my old friend Ruth in County Clare , she sent me two colourful masks that she made for me.

I feel the need to expand. I would love to get on a bus into town.A train to Glasgow Central, there is nothing like that feeling when I arrive at that station . A train to London and Cambridge I will certainly go to see the Angel of the North as soon as it is safe to do so.


All shall be well
and all shall be well
and all manner of things shall be well.

May weekend!

Sunday May 3rd,


another week has passed and we are still in lockdown.

This week The Prime Minister is back at work . He has recovered from Covid 19  and is girlfriend has had a baby boy, he has been through a lot.

I am not confident that he is the right man for the job at this time, it is quite frightening when you look around the world at some of the leaders, it feels like it is the blind leading the blind.

I imagine that it would be good if there was more consultation going on ,a more co-ordinated approach.I hope there is behind the scenes. I think if we knew more we would feel better.As humans we like to feel in control even if it is just an illusion.

In the end we have to make up our own minds about when we feel it is safe to go out ,and where we choose to go.

I hear that some young people are finding lockdown hard and are going out anyway.  Some people feel annoyed as they are giving up their lifestyle for the elderly. I get that ;it must be hard ;if you don't think there is much chance of you getting the virus ,or if you do it will just be like flu.
Each of us is on our own journey through this .
We don't know what will happen when we do go out again ,or when pubs and theatres open.I imagine it will be trial and error.

I continue to have people pop past my window, I am so happy to be on the ground floor.

I have a folding chair and an umbrella by the window. I have flasks which are wiped down before and after each use,they are filled with tea or coffee.I wear my marigold gloves to bring in the shopping etc.

It can be quite festive a highlight of my day. This week a very big highlight was that Andrew came over to bring me his stand for my laptop, his keyboard and mouse. Which meant that I could try them out over the weekend and decide if I would like to have them to go with my laptop.

I have decided that I would like them . I won't hunch over so much with these additions.And I want to do more writing during this time maybe and after too .

I am listening to more Radio 3 again, the news is too alarming on Radio 4 too much analysis and it just creep up on me after a nice enjoyable programme.

I ordered and jigsaw for Andrew and Lucy a few weeks ago of Inveraray Castle, I got in on ebay it was only 5 dollars for the puzzle and £19 to have it delivered from America.

It looks great and will pass a few evenings for them.

I have my Zoom chats with the sisters on Monday afternoons, I have had a few with Gary and Sam too One with Matthew and Marie.

I send out emails to my students with ideas for homework and I still do a few telephone counselling sessions.

I had another marathon call with Susan this morning, almost 3 hours, what do we get to talk about :)

I have had a few shopping deliveries with fresh fruit vegetable and salad, great stuff I have had a big cook in which I enjoy doing, and I did a big bake in too mostly for Andrew and Lucy

I came across some writing that I did a few years back while John was in Marie Curie, it made disturbing reading and I cried a lot that day, that was such a tough time for me,  for all of us.

I think as we are hearing of so much death every day it stirs up deeper feelings and memories ;maybe in all of us; certainly for me.

This is a very difficult time for the world .We are all doing our best I am sure ; some days I feel optimistic and believe that all will be well, and other days I feel very frightened that I will end up in hospital unable to breathe ,or worse one of the children will.
I am glad Philip is in Taiwan for now as he has sarcoidosis - and I feel terrified when I think what might happen if he contracted the virus.

I think I might need to see the dentist , I don't know if they are open, what the procedure is.

I will call tomorrow and I might need to talk to the doctor too and I don't know what is happening there either. All things I normally take for granted, now I wonder how to get to the dentist ,as I usually go by bus or uber, both things I am not supposed to do at this time.

All shall be well
and all shall be well
and all manner of things shall be well........and so it is.